Every time I say to myself that I have reached my limit or that I'm past my limit, I have the instant emotional response that it's just not true. Like most, throughout my life I've had a variety of experiences, some pretty harsh trials and many lessons in endurance and perseverance. Here's a few tips on how to keep going when you feel there is no possible way you can.
1. Ignore reality. Not completely, but in some ways ignore the elements that make you feel there is no way out. Relationships that are ending, finances that are drained and the faith of others in your talents that has just run out are all real and actual problems. In personal and professional realms, there are times when you just can't see moving forward nor feel you have the strength to do so. I suggest you ignore it a little and get out of your current perspective.
I can recall the day I drove into Millcreek Broadcasting, a small Utah radio group, to apply for a job. At twenty two I hadn't had a single day of advertising experience in a traditional sense, but felt I had what it would take to sell ads and help to craft campaigns. I'd been debate President, Student Body President, had outsold senior counterparts at my first event and had held positions that required me to get people to do things. My first interview was with Steve Plime, followed by Brent Carlson and Sheila O'Connor. Though excited about moving through the stages of the interview, they were all held on different days and it was getting hard to justify the gas and time. After the three interviews, I waited for good news and borrowed a few dollars for my first days in advertising sales. I got a call from Steve and a request for a fourth interview with all three of the managers. I went in with my hopes high and then my heart sank when Steve spoke.
"We aren't sure if we should give you a job or escort you out of the building," he said.
Wow.
Really?
Wow...
As if on auto response, I replied. "What am I supposed to do with that?" My heart raced and I struggled to keep my composure. I'm extremely filled with emotion and passion, which gets the best of me at times. This was not going to be one of them.
"We are going to leave it up to you," said Steve. "Why don't you go think about it and let us know how you feel after you do."
They had to be joking. Wasn't my being there an indication of how I felt? Wasn't the four interviews enough? I was livid, but stood up, shook their three hands and went to talk to my mom.
"Just put on a suit and go to work tomorrow," she said smoothly.
My mom always has had great advice and I did exactly as she told me with Millcreek. I got dressed the next day and with my confidence nowhere to be found, forced myself to walk in the front door of the small building, past the glaring receptionist and went upstairs to ask where my desk was. After a short tour and a few introductions, my new sales manager showed me to a desk opposite Dave Gregerson and Tammy Montoya then handed me a Yellow Pages. I hit the phones, set up meetings and prayed my gas would see me through until my first paycheck. Each call I made and meeting I set returned a bit of my confidence and in no time, I became a top rep with clients who had never before advertised with the stations geared to the young target market. If I'd have focused on the holes in my resume, the lack of a degree or the fact that I wasn't actually offered a job, I would not have been successful. Ignore the details just a little and push forward. Not seeing how it will work out doesn't mean that it won't.
2. Garner support from yourself. If you have no family, if your friends have seen you fail and you have a distaste for self help materials, find support internally.
Ten days ago, I was submitting an expression of interest for a grant through the IVCC, which stands for the Innovative Vector Control Consortium. Although confident in the product and ideas I was submitting, it was a new process for me with an exact deadline and a fairly big team of associates that had advice, edits and input for the submission. To say it was an intense process would be a dramatic understatement and I was feeling the pressure. We're talking malaria, West Nile Virus and other harsh disease. How much weight does that come with? How much had I learned and what more could I do to help with this global problem? Every day was a challenge, especially since I still had to provide for my family, service my clients and perform routine tasks. I struggled with finding time to see my mentors and with owing everyone money while I got through some necessary transitions. With the anxiety growing and my confidence once again slipping, I woke up one morning (if you call three am "morning") and reached for a sweater so I'd be cozy in the pool house without messing with the on again off again heater. I pulled on the tight shirt, walked out to where I could turn on some lights and laughed. It was the sweater I'd been given as Student Body President in the eighth grade.
Far from "popular," I can't really recall what made me run for student body except a crush on David Goff, who was also running. My best friends became embarrassed of me and the popular crowd made fun of me but at home, my mom reminded me of something.
"There are more nerds than there are popular kids," she said. I wasn't sure how to feel about it, but knew it was true. "You've always been nice to all the different groups and when people vote, they tend to pick people that have been good to them."
I continued my campaign and won the title of Eighth Grade Student Body President. It was a big deal and it made me feel proud of myself in new ways. Fast forward to the IVCC grant letter. With little time left and the pressure of our deadline being felt by all, I kept the sweater on instead of returning it to my nostalgia collection and pushed until we submitted that application. Find your internal motivation and hold onto it.
3. Don't give up, whatever that means. Giving up isn't always a singular act. Sometimes giving up is a single or string of tasks that go undone, get put off or emotions that cause you to hesitate or delay success. Don't give up on a goal until it is accomplished and don't put off the things that need your attention even if you aren't comfortable.
I started a business with my now ex husband and the goal was to help people make money from home on a residual basis by reselling our VoIP phone service. We hit it hard and did great right away. I worked on partners, built databases and constantly operated outside of my comfort zone. He focused on sales and training additional sales people. Because it was a rapidly growing company in a high risk arena, we had multiple back up plans but we agreed to focus on customer service and grow sales through a superior amount of attention to our long term customers. In our first year, we made three point three million dollars with some impressive margins and then, greed stepped in. Our plans to re-invest into new technology became less important to my partner than the clout that came with being a millionaire or the outfit he was wearing to the roulette table. We fought daily, tensions soared and there were constant changes to our initial plans. No longer was I trusted or enabled to make key decisions and I was reminded of my position as VP almost daily. I was not the majority owner and if I made too much noise, everyone would be fired. This was the threat and for a while, I didn't know what to do other than keep going and try to make him see that we needed to stick to our original plans. On a trip to Alabama, it became very clear that there was going to be no changes, no resolution to improve the services we offered and no effort to accomplish our original goals. I was devastated. Our marriage was past the point of saving for other reasons but I was proud of the business we had built and the growing stack of commission checks I got to send out. I worried for the staff and customers but knew I was no longer making the situation any better. I went back to Arizona and made the trip to the county offices to take my name off of the business.
Looking back, I didn't give up when I took my name off the business, my partner and I gave up through each exception to our own rules and through putting off the things we initially knew were important, regardless of our individual reasons or justification. Although the business is still in operation, it is a far cry from the business that everyone informed us "just had a buzz about it" and that employed just shy of a hundred people at it's peak. The goals of the company have changed and the team that used to high five and clap for each others accomplishments is no longer. Don't give up, whatever that means in your situation and be ready to step to the plate when you see others giving up on core concepts.
Currently, I have some incredibly talented associates in a wide variety of fields and we are doing some very cool things. Every day we encounter new opportunities, learn more and scale our progress. Not every week day but every day. Yes, it's tiring. Yes it's rewarding and if you look at the state of our globe, it's definitely go time. There's a lot to be done and through past experiences, I know there is no such thing as personal limits.
1. Ignore reality. Not completely, but in some ways ignore the elements that make you feel there is no way out. Relationships that are ending, finances that are drained and the faith of others in your talents that has just run out are all real and actual problems. In personal and professional realms, there are times when you just can't see moving forward nor feel you have the strength to do so. I suggest you ignore it a little and get out of your current perspective.
I can recall the day I drove into Millcreek Broadcasting, a small Utah radio group, to apply for a job. At twenty two I hadn't had a single day of advertising experience in a traditional sense, but felt I had what it would take to sell ads and help to craft campaigns. I'd been debate President, Student Body President, had outsold senior counterparts at my first event and had held positions that required me to get people to do things. My first interview was with Steve Plime, followed by Brent Carlson and Sheila O'Connor. Though excited about moving through the stages of the interview, they were all held on different days and it was getting hard to justify the gas and time. After the three interviews, I waited for good news and borrowed a few dollars for my first days in advertising sales. I got a call from Steve and a request for a fourth interview with all three of the managers. I went in with my hopes high and then my heart sank when Steve spoke.
"We aren't sure if we should give you a job or escort you out of the building," he said.
Wow.
Really?
Wow...
As if on auto response, I replied. "What am I supposed to do with that?" My heart raced and I struggled to keep my composure. I'm extremely filled with emotion and passion, which gets the best of me at times. This was not going to be one of them.
"We are going to leave it up to you," said Steve. "Why don't you go think about it and let us know how you feel after you do."
They had to be joking. Wasn't my being there an indication of how I felt? Wasn't the four interviews enough? I was livid, but stood up, shook their three hands and went to talk to my mom.
"Just put on a suit and go to work tomorrow," she said smoothly.
My mom always has had great advice and I did exactly as she told me with Millcreek. I got dressed the next day and with my confidence nowhere to be found, forced myself to walk in the front door of the small building, past the glaring receptionist and went upstairs to ask where my desk was. After a short tour and a few introductions, my new sales manager showed me to a desk opposite Dave Gregerson and Tammy Montoya then handed me a Yellow Pages. I hit the phones, set up meetings and prayed my gas would see me through until my first paycheck. Each call I made and meeting I set returned a bit of my confidence and in no time, I became a top rep with clients who had never before advertised with the stations geared to the young target market. If I'd have focused on the holes in my resume, the lack of a degree or the fact that I wasn't actually offered a job, I would not have been successful. Ignore the details just a little and push forward. Not seeing how it will work out doesn't mean that it won't.
2. Garner support from yourself. If you have no family, if your friends have seen you fail and you have a distaste for self help materials, find support internally.
Ten days ago, I was submitting an expression of interest for a grant through the IVCC, which stands for the Innovative Vector Control Consortium. Although confident in the product and ideas I was submitting, it was a new process for me with an exact deadline and a fairly big team of associates that had advice, edits and input for the submission. To say it was an intense process would be a dramatic understatement and I was feeling the pressure. We're talking malaria, West Nile Virus and other harsh disease. How much weight does that come with? How much had I learned and what more could I do to help with this global problem? Every day was a challenge, especially since I still had to provide for my family, service my clients and perform routine tasks. I struggled with finding time to see my mentors and with owing everyone money while I got through some necessary transitions. With the anxiety growing and my confidence once again slipping, I woke up one morning (if you call three am "morning") and reached for a sweater so I'd be cozy in the pool house without messing with the on again off again heater. I pulled on the tight shirt, walked out to where I could turn on some lights and laughed. It was the sweater I'd been given as Student Body President in the eighth grade. Far from "popular," I can't really recall what made me run for student body except a crush on David Goff, who was also running. My best friends became embarrassed of me and the popular crowd made fun of me but at home, my mom reminded me of something.
"There are more nerds than there are popular kids," she said. I wasn't sure how to feel about it, but knew it was true. "You've always been nice to all the different groups and when people vote, they tend to pick people that have been good to them."
I continued my campaign and won the title of Eighth Grade Student Body President. It was a big deal and it made me feel proud of myself in new ways. Fast forward to the IVCC grant letter. With little time left and the pressure of our deadline being felt by all, I kept the sweater on instead of returning it to my nostalgia collection and pushed until we submitted that application. Find your internal motivation and hold onto it.
3. Don't give up, whatever that means. Giving up isn't always a singular act. Sometimes giving up is a single or string of tasks that go undone, get put off or emotions that cause you to hesitate or delay success. Don't give up on a goal until it is accomplished and don't put off the things that need your attention even if you aren't comfortable.
I started a business with my now ex husband and the goal was to help people make money from home on a residual basis by reselling our VoIP phone service. We hit it hard and did great right away. I worked on partners, built databases and constantly operated outside of my comfort zone. He focused on sales and training additional sales people. Because it was a rapidly growing company in a high risk arena, we had multiple back up plans but we agreed to focus on customer service and grow sales through a superior amount of attention to our long term customers. In our first year, we made three point three million dollars with some impressive margins and then, greed stepped in. Our plans to re-invest into new technology became less important to my partner than the clout that came with being a millionaire or the outfit he was wearing to the roulette table. We fought daily, tensions soared and there were constant changes to our initial plans. No longer was I trusted or enabled to make key decisions and I was reminded of my position as VP almost daily. I was not the majority owner and if I made too much noise, everyone would be fired. This was the threat and for a while, I didn't know what to do other than keep going and try to make him see that we needed to stick to our original plans. On a trip to Alabama, it became very clear that there was going to be no changes, no resolution to improve the services we offered and no effort to accomplish our original goals. I was devastated. Our marriage was past the point of saving for other reasons but I was proud of the business we had built and the growing stack of commission checks I got to send out. I worried for the staff and customers but knew I was no longer making the situation any better. I went back to Arizona and made the trip to the county offices to take my name off of the business.
Looking back, I didn't give up when I took my name off the business, my partner and I gave up through each exception to our own rules and through putting off the things we initially knew were important, regardless of our individual reasons or justification. Although the business is still in operation, it is a far cry from the business that everyone informed us "just had a buzz about it" and that employed just shy of a hundred people at it's peak. The goals of the company have changed and the team that used to high five and clap for each others accomplishments is no longer. Don't give up, whatever that means in your situation and be ready to step to the plate when you see others giving up on core concepts.
Currently, I have some incredibly talented associates in a wide variety of fields and we are doing some very cool things. Every day we encounter new opportunities, learn more and scale our progress. Not every week day but every day. Yes, it's tiring. Yes it's rewarding and if you look at the state of our globe, it's definitely go time. There's a lot to be done and through past experiences, I know there is no such thing as personal limits.
It looks like this is a year and about 4 months ago; but thanks for it!
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